I spent a lot of my life trying to explain my actions
However everything magnetizes to me like I’m an attraction
Everything’s always been quite extreme
Carrying, varying bags so full they burst at the seems
Once I’ve learned it I grow stagnant….
I want it all won’t settle for a fragment
I’m such an extrovert
I want to share every new thing I learn with every person I meet….
Yet I’m also such an introvert I need to retreat
I’ve always had an appetite for life
and I need to eat
My feet need to meet with the beat of the street
You cannot learn to the level I seek by remaining still and accepting meek
allowing time to slip by…
second by second
week by week…
I went to write the caption to this post and the above pondering poem came out so I will just leave it right there. Followed with this flow of thought below…Continue reading
I feel things.
I always have.
Maybe it’s because I’m a scorpio.
Maybe it’s just me.
Maybe it is part of my destiny?
I have also had to learn to release things.
I have had to learn to release my grip on life and people.
Release things that no longer serve me and my higher good.
I don’t always know what that is but I know my soul does.
Sometimes the release is a good cry.
Sometimes it’s making wild love. (Also scorpio in me)Continue reading
I spent almost a month in England, twice, with Leon prior to his big move to Canada in October 2019, I’m keen to return to the castles, churches, history and my families home land. I’m first generation born Canadian.
I’ve always been obsessed with castles and architecture ….Arundel Castle (in the first photo) is one of my all time favourites… the rose garden smelled like heavenly bliss. 🌸🌸
I’ve been to London, Manchester, Stone Henge, York and the Yorkshire Dales (we took a ride on the old steam train 🚂), visited Whitby the birth place and inspiration behind Bram Stokers Dracula and Bath.
The last time we were in England we were packing things up, getting affairs settled, settling tenants, saying good bye to family etc. on top of country hopping through Europe to squeeze in a last road trip while Leon had his car.
I remember at the time all of the feelings I had of trepidation and pressure with the move. THIS was a BIG move. If we had difficulties with our relationship etc there was no where for Leon to go if I needed to establish boundaries for me and the kiddos. (blending a family is hard even under the most convenient circumstances) Leon was giving up everything (yet also gaining everything 🥰).Continue reading
I never ever thought there would come a time that I would get over my ex let alone find someone who could be as kind, romantic, playful and gentle. I felt like no one could ever ‘fill his shoes’ the bar had been set pretty high… and it wouldn’t even be fair to anyone to attempt a relationship. The few times I tried I ended things quickly just feeling discouraged. I considered myself lucky to had even had the opportunity to have a love like I had with my ex.
I felt these things and this way because I wasn’t yet fully healed.Continue reading
It’s been thirteen years,
It was a year that
I realized my fears
A year that I thought
I may drown in my own tears
The memory of it
On my heart
burned so deep
I felt abandoned
And Scarred Continue reading
Oh the great debate…
I love getting inspired by blog posts.
I happened upon this post today What’s good for the Soul do that and as I started to comment I realized that maybe I should start a discussion and create a post rather than take up a page worth of his comment section! The post is about racism, understanding, cultural differences and acceptance. Below is what I hoped to post in his comment section in response to his post.
There is beauty in all things even in the people that appear to have no beauty. Even in those who exude hatred. There is a beauty with in them that is very hard to see and understand. It is complicated and requires much time to untangle the actions and moments of their experience in life. Ignorance is such a complicated issue. Society, culture, family, history and experience combine to create belief systems and thought patterns that many people are unaware they even possess. Continue reading
Your denim and mine
Feels roughly fine
Divine Continue reading
I walk and wait
Drowning (in my own fears)
Frowning (the lost years)
Of new life
Reminders of a different day
Full of cries of life
Not anguish and strife
Tears pooling my eyes
I dare not blink
I want the tears to dry
For I fear if I cry
Let a single tear drop
My heart may just stop
Along with yours